Tuesday, July 25, 2017


So July 11, 2017 was a craptastic day. Went to the bank and Starbucks, leaving the house for the first time except work, ended up in a car wreck. Dumb little girl pulled out of the car wash and I ended up hitting the back end of her vehicle. Of course it was an SUV and my car was the one that was the losing one. I knew that was going to be the outcome of it after looking at it the very first moment. But the girl was well insured and her company had called by the time i was back from the shop the wrecker too it too. They had a rental car set up for me in under an hour from the wreck happening. Two days later they called and let me know that it was indeed totaled as I knew it would be. The original offer they gave me was way low and I have a friend that works for the company and said to ask for a better amount. So now I have no car, my hours at work are down too like 15 or so a week, which doesn't help me get money enough to get another car decent enough to work Uber.

I'm so tired of being here. Since I have no car I can no longer go and do anything other than go to work. I want to go to San Antonio and go to Six Flags or shop, which I have no money for since I no longer work enough hours to even pay some bills. And since I have no car I can't work anywhere but in this stupid ass town. All there is to do in this shithole is work in fast food and I will never do that shit, I barely eat that crap I could never work there. Ugh fuck this town and this state.


Monday, July 3, 2017


So I'm back from my time in Michigan. I've hated every minute of being in Texas. This is not my home and the stupid heat does nothing to make me happy, I hate being overly hot!! I have only left the house to get groceries the day after I got back, and to go to work. I only have been outside to get the mail, go in and get my tea from Starbucks, and walk into the fuckhole that is the mall that my job is in. Legitimately I am the most miserable person right now, I'm either crying, sleeping or at work. I've been trying to watch this season of Big Brother and I can't stand any of the new people and Paul from BB18 sucks just as much. I follow a spoiler page so I knew that the girl Meagan left before the show aired the Sunday show, as well as the chick Christmas breaking her foot or some shit, what the hell do you do in that house to break your foot when there isn't a comp??
I am filled with a desire to do not a damn thing. Been sitting in my chair with Fiyero on my lap for the most part unless I'm at work. No friends and depression is a great thing apparently. I have the next two days off and nothing to do. Tomorrow is the 4th of July and since I have no friends I get to sit at home alone with the cats. I could go up to Fiesta Texas tomorrow, but I've done that shit on the 4th before and i wanted to punch eery soul that was in any realm of me. Everyone is walking way to slow, lines are stupid long for rides, food, etc, so unless I want to go to jail for slapping some dumb ass bitch i best stay away. 

I guess this dumb ass rant is done I'm out.


Saturday, June 24, 2017

Vacation 2017

We left Texas at around 4pm on June 14th, planning to drive straight through the night. I am taking off a bunch of days 15th-26th so can possibly do something. We made it out of Texas actually before midnight, shockingly, drove thru Arkansas and got in to Missouri around 6 am. I always drive as my mothers driving scares the shit out of me. I ended up having to let her drive around 9 as i had been up over 24 hours at that point. She drove until about 30 miles out of Indy, we stopped by the speedway as it is tradition. Went in and looked at the gift shops and wanted to do the track bus tour, but they weren't running them because there was a group using the road track. Going to IMS always makes me so happy, it feels like happiness and home. So i grabbed a Henchfield shirt and we headed on our way. There was 3 hours left in the damn drive and i was so over being in that damn car and driving. Ended up taking a wrong turn and was in some Amish area, getting stuck behind buggys and scooters and bikes. I just wanted to be done.
Got into town and made the first stop at a Biggby coffee to get the first of what will be many pomaberry smoothie. Got to the house finally and unloaded the car and went to bed, I had maybe 2 hours sleep since 8 am on Weds. Friday we were able to surprise my cousins kiddos with showing up at their house on the girls final day of first grade. There are plans for tomorrow(saturday) to go get the boys stitches out and go to a fair thing so they can get Elephant Ears there.
So Saturday consisted of getting the boys stitches out. We went to Urgent Care to get them out, poor kid fought it every step of the way. Trying to get the old bandage off was a struggle of me holding him and my cousin pulling off the tape and having to straighten out his finger the whole time. We had to cover the spot up with our hands so he wouldn't cry the whole time. After that we got everyone loaded into the ride and went to the fair so they could get grease and sugar. When everyone was done we let the kids play on the playground for a bit and then went to the house so Eric could grill and stuff for dinner. Sunday we did a bunch of nothing until it was time to go over for fathers day bbq. Monday I went with another cousin and met her sons girlfriend finally. She is such a sweet girl, we went swimming at her friends house and spent time visiting and junk. Tuesday night was family dinner and then drinks at hide a way. 
Wednesday we went to Three Rivers to meet up with an old friend of my parents at Applebees. I didn't eat there as the food is not good to me. That night I drove up to Saugatuck to meet up with a friend from elementary school who i had not seen since 1988/9. We spent a good while catching up and walking around town. It felt nice to spend the time with her, I miss having people to do things with. Thursday we had dinner with another friend of my parents, then waited for Linds and everyone to get home with their new puppy. We spent some time visiting with the puppy and then I said my goodbyes to the kids and Lindsey. Went to the house and started organizing all my crap to leave in the morning. 
I left Friday at around 9ish, every bit of me and my soul didn't want to leave to come back to Texas. Drove home a different way so I could stop in Springfield, MO to see Kortney for a bit. Visited with her for awhile and then continued the drive. I spent 5 hours listening to the live podcast weekend thing that happens twice a year. They helped me stay awake from about Little Rock to about Waco, I stopped at a gas station and rested for a bit as it was raining kind of hard and I had watched an SUV lose control and hit the center median,spin and then I almost hit them as they were turned sideways in my lane. The rest of the trip back sucked, and I came to the conclusion that the moment I hit Texas my road rage and hatred of people is super amplified and I truly hate it here. Everything about this state makes me cringe. Very few people here make me give a shit about staying, I hate the heat, I hate that when it rains here everyone forgets how to drive and that it floods so quickly. I never wanted to be here and there is nothing keeping me here other than my mother for some unknown reason won't leave this dumb ass state. She doesn't ever leave the house unless its for a dr appt, going to the store, Starbucks, or one day a week spending two hours volunteering. Like what the actual fuck, why won't you leave? No friends, no family, no nothing! Why do we still live in this crap hole town???????